I hate the fact that I'm braindead in all things important.

I'm also angry at how gullible I am. An idiot in every fashion. I embody it. I don't see why people like me, or even say they like me. I'm not that great in anything. All I am is a fuck up who can't talk to anyone without some kind of lawyer-like guidance as to what to say when and how to say it and what is appropriate to say when.

You can't trust anyone it seems. Privacy is non-existing. I'm better off living in the Netherlands where they never close their window blinds! And the fact that I was blind to this just makes it even more obvious that I'm stupid.

I DON'T KNOW HOW THE WORLD REALLY WORKS!

Plain and simple right there. Why do I even bother trying to talk to people? Is it cause I'm tired of being alone? Is it cause I want some kind of attention that I'm not getting? What is it?

And this anger. This fucking fire that just is burning. Tonight has been one of those night where nothing is going right and every possible thing that can go wrong has. This burning rage. If I was a fighter, I'd hate to see what kind of damage this can do.

Yeah, everything is going wrong tonight. I can't even blog right.