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No Reply
Composed and Arranged by Yoko Kanno
Words by Tim Jensen
Vocals by Steve Conte

Like the perfect ending
It's won't be too long
Till everything I've ruined has seen me gone
In time, I pray you'll forgive
Now you know the man I am
Can you forgive me?

I fall
Like the sands of time
Like some broken rhyme
At feet no longer there

If only I could call the rain to melt and wash away the pain you feel
I would
You gave yourself to me and showed me what the truth could be
For that, I say thank you
This was my life
It never made much sense to me

With every lie that I lived
Part of me would fade
Into this empty shadow I've become
And now I feel so numb
I no longer know myself
But I still know you

I call
And there's no reply
Like some phantom cry
On ears too far away

I close my eyes and watch as my life passes by
The only thing I see is you
For all the times you walked the line for me and standing by my side
I say thank you
Here lies my life
It never felt that real to me

You'll always mean so much to me
And there's no reply
And there's no reply
You'll never know how much you mean to me
And there's no reply
And there's no reply
You'll never know how much you mean to me

If only I could call the rain to melt and wash away the pain you feel
I would
You gave yourself to me and showed me what the truth could be
For that, I say thank you
I close my eyes and watch as my life passes by
The only thing I see is you
For all the times you walked the line for me and standing by my side
I say thank you

You in my life
It all meant so much more to me

Too bad I can't record this with me singing it. I seem to be singing it alot in my head and when I'm alone (which is alot).

Yup, that's right for all thought that actually come back and read this. My life has gotten worst. I've screwed up another good thing and all my dreams and ideals and hopes and anything else good and pure has been casted to the wind. They claim that I have no emotion, but I truely doubt they know how much pain is going through my heart right now. I know they don't know what is going through my mind. I don't even think they listen to me. They will never know what I am about, what I really feel, how I deal with what I feel, everything. No one will ever understand me.

So once again, I'm at a dead end. I may be calling it too early; I may not. All I know is that I am back to where I was and more than likely would have been if I never found Andrew's message on AOL. I'm back questioning a future I don't think I even have.

So what happens now? Where do I go from here? What do you do when you lose everything and have nothing, not even a clue where to start again? It's as if I was born into this world again. Without guidence. Without thought. Without even any kind of weight of importance. That I'm really just expendible. What do you do when you have nothing?

Maybe I should see about moving to Florida and working full time at DisneyQuest. Oh wait, Zeek. I hate to tell you this, but where would you live? And how can you get to DisneyQuest? You don't even drive!

Whoever told me that the law of averages states that my life can only get better after getting worst is wrong. It seems like I'm always taking one step forward and three steps back.

I am so better off dead.