Hey Paul,

I need to apologize to you once again. This time it's a biggie.

I'm not sure if you aware or not, but I was talked into avoiding you. It made sense to me at the time because of how much of a dork I made myself in front of you.

The sad fact is that I can't stop thinking about you. It's hard not to. I know, I know, I'm not really in love with you, but you are still cool. I'm not just saying that. You are. The way I treated you wasn't right, the way I just dropped you cold like I did.

Can you forgive me?

I doubt you will since you barely know me and all that, but I thought I'd just try if for nothing else to make me feel better.

Hope to hear from you soon... oh, and Sunday, if you come by the house with Michael, I look forward to seeing you. I have a gift for you if you want it. Just something I felt would be the proper way to apologize to you for being a jerk.

I hope we can still be friends.

That was the e-mail I wrote to Paul just awhile ago. I probibly made another mistake, but for now, I don't want to think about it.

It's like what someone once told me, "Live for the moment and never for the future."