This isn't helping.

I couldn't sleep. All I could think about what James and Dan and if they forgive me for what I did. I popped online to see if they were one, almost as if to try to get back to sleep.

James was on. I talked to him, but he just felt so distanced, so far away.

I didn't talk to him long. He didn't say if he was going to be on tomorrow/later tonight or not. He didn't even tell me if I can IM him if I see him.

I've never felt this lonely for a long time.