I Should Stop

I caught myself doing two things today. Both of which I really need to stop doing before it ends up hurting me in the end.

The first thing I noticed is that I masturbated for the I-don't-know-how-many day in a row! Sure, it helps relieve stress and all that, but I've been doing it for about 22 months now, if not a little bit longer (provided you don't count that one month where I didn't do it because I was dared not to by Shin). Call me naive, but I read somewhere that a habit like that can cause pre-mature ejaculation. I need another one of those challenges. Maybe I should not masturbate until I actually go out on a date with an actual guy that likes me.

The second thing I noticed is that I seem to be floating back and forth between groups of people like a fly. For some stupid reason, if there is a group of people somewhere within my sight, I flock to them. I try to mingle with them. In the end, I end up leaving knowing that I will never be a part of their social group, their conversation, or even their circle of people with similar interests. I caught myself doing that today no more than 30 minutes ago prior to this blog entry. To be quite honest about it, I think I should just stop trying to hang out with people. It worked in high school, and I gained a somewhat nice social group of people. Granted they were all the high school outcasts, but still. You would think that being in college, especially an art college, people would be more open to people. That is true to some extent, but not to my satisfaction. I rather not try at all and see what happens. I have this odd feeling that I'll end up getting socially isolated even more than I am now, however. But still, I cannot continue being this way, always floating around until I find a group of already established friends that will accept me.

I should also stop eating anything sugary. I did for the first time in a while, and my teeth hurt like hell. I'm going to brush after dinner like my life depended on it.