I Should Probably Explain Myself

With the forums over at Gaia down for routine maintenance, I decided to take this opportunity to explain a few things.

It's become more and more clear to me as the days go by that I do not post anything about my personal life anymore on here. I mostly post news that I found strange and/or appalling and trivial things. More recently, I've started to share prints from my Black & White Photography class. However, I'm not really sharing much of anything these days about what is going on in my life.

Somewhere in the back of my mind is a voice saying that no one cares about your personal life, but I know that's wrong. I'm sure someone does care, but as to whom and how much they know up until I started doing the whole "News, Trivia, and Personal Thoughts" approach is beyond me.

So what of my personal life?

In short, I have none.

I've been distancing myself from other people for reasons that I have yet to acquire. If anything, it is because I feel I don't belong in the very room they are in. People are starting to scare me if not intimidate me. They make me feel not up to par with anything that I want to do or can do.

Thanks to Philosophy, I've decided that being different and refusing to conform to the way society thinks isn't a wrong thing. I don't mind not having a job, cash, or the ability to drive. In fact, I find more content in dependency than in what few situations of independence I've had. If you see that as something wrong, go for it. Your just being a part of the mainstream conformity, and I am just being an idiot.

I picked back up my Pokemon addiction due to stress. What kind of stress? Well, my sculpture broke thanks to gravity. I know where I went wrong, however. I was trying to be economical with the free plaster, so as it started to harden, I used what I could to make the rock face in my cave. Basically, because I know I haven't explain this project on here, I'm making a cave inside of a box. Well, technically it's a rock tunnel, but it's along the same idea. Basically, I'm trying to give the view of what a box is to a kid to an adult audience. Those of you that have small kids would probably know what I'm talking about. (Zero, I'm thinking of you.)

Crushes and love interests. Now there's something I don't really talk about much anymore. I've pretty much stopped looking and decided to let love find me. My New Years resolution is to not fall in love. Historically, I've never been able to keep one of these resolutions let alone start one. The plan was that this would back fire and I'd be in love before mid-term. Not really happening. There are a few cute guys in all of my classes, but I know they are unavailable because they are either straight or they smoke and/or drink. The only time I ever actually looked for love was recently in the newly revamped Yahoo! Personals site. As you can see in my past post this week, I am my own best match. I know better than anyone not to trust those kind of matches, but you have to admit, it was rather funny.

So what of the big soap opera that is my relationship between the mysterious David, Bill, James, Leo, and everyone else I only give their very common first names with?

Well, I don't know if I've reported this or not, but I'm not going to spend the summer with David. He doesn't feel safe anymore around me. Leo is more than likely going to get hitched to a boy he fancies, which means less and less time talking to him. I don't know why, but every time someone gets into a relationship, the relationship I've had with them fads out rather quickly. Bill's off preparing for his big 18th birthday bash which will send shock waves across the globe if not farther. Everyone is invited, and all but me can make it. While everyone can clear their schedules, I'm pretty much locked in like a prisoner. Haven't really heard much from James, Dan, or even Josh for that matter. Andrew and I haven't really talked for about a little under a year, give or take. Then again, he is studying to be a doctor, so that's understandable. If I talk to anyone on that end, it's mostly Sam or Ryan these days. When we do talk, it's nothing worth writing about. It's mostly playing catch-up. Sure, there are the occasional social conversation spun off of something one of us said, but for the most part it's generally along the lines of "How was your week?" and "What are you up to?"

Boring, huh?

My blog is already boring as is, and I'm pretty sure, outside of maybe one or two people, most would think the same way. In a vain attempt to get some readers, I did what Shem does and post news stories with my opinions attached to them. The only difference between me and Shem is that Shem is more educated and has valid opinions that you could build the Trump Tower on. As for me, I'm posting news that very few people care about or would even hear in the morning on the news station of their choosing.

The good news is that I'm no longer really complaining about mindless shit like it's the end of the world on here. I've saved that for real life.