Have you ever come across someone who just didn't seem right in the head? Logic and the social norm seem to just disappear with this person. In many ways, they seem to be the kind of being you cannot simply get why they act the way they do. Even if they give you a reason that you could hold water in, there is still something about them that just doesn't feel "right." So you see them as quirky, strange, queer, or just plain weird.
But stop a moment and think. What is normal and what is weird? A broad question for sure; one that has been asked several times since the very first sighting of something strange or unusual. Well, allow me to present the following example as a way of narrowing down the field of thought some.
One day, while in the middle of my five hour break between classes, a fellow student came along and started conversation with me. We somehow got onto the subject of why I don't drive. Not wanting to supply a reason for the millionth time, I said in passing that I don't have a reason that my fellow student would accept compared to someone I know that has motorphobia, or a fear of cars. This made her curious. I then proceeded to tell the story of how he's been in too many major wrecks in such a short time as a passenger to where he's afraid of getting into a car. In a childlike manner, she asked how he gets to class. Instantly, I said that he travels by bus. The innocence of her curiosity carried over as she asked if he isn't worried about the bus being hit in an accident. From that point on, I couldn't supply a reason why he feels more comfortable using what little public transit our town has instead of driving. What I remember saying fell short, to where my fellow student pretty much nodded and took it for face value. He can't drive because he is afraid of getting into a wreck.
In reality, there is more to this than she can ever understand. There is probably more to this than even I could understand. For example, just recently, I found out that he doesn't mind getting into the cars of people he trusts when they are behind the wheel. He still has panic attacks if he is asked to get into a car with someone he doesn't know very well. Now this new bit of information may have some justice in the asking of the last question in the previous conversation I wrote about. If he is okay getting into a car, as a passenger, of someone he trusts, how can he possible get on a bus without having a panic attack?
My answer is just because he can. However, reason and logic interfere with most people, and my answer isn't acceptable. If he is afraid of getting into a crash in a car with a driver he doesn't know well, chances are he's afraid of getting into a crash while on a bus. Yet he isn't. A contradiction in terms that has no real merit as to why he just doesn't drive himself.
So why then is this seen as odd and not making sense to anyone but him and myself? Well, for starters, there is only one of him and only one of me. Each of us has have only certain experiences up until this point. No two people can have the same experience. It's a philosophical impossibility. That is why nobody will ever truly understand him. Not even myself, even though I'm very open to all walks of life short of hating people for no real good reason (ie. Racism).
You are not me. I am not you. You have not lived my life through my eyes. I have not experienced several wrecks in a row in a short period of time as a passenger to know the trauma and fear that would cause a person. Everything we know about anyone outside of ourselves is inferred, told from an outside party. And even when an experience is told by the source, it is nothing like actually experiencing it for yourself.
As far as how much each person is will into accept, or say that they understand, that's up to the individual. You can either take their word as golden, as brass, or as complete bull. But only the ones that are either open or crazy themselves are the ones to accept exception in the idea of what a phobia is instead of seeing a fear in absolutes.
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