The Big Day

I know that I haven't been posting anything in a long time. Too long, in fact. Hell, my Spore blog is probably as dead as this one right now, but that's another story.

The point is that I've been busier than I ever been. Frustrated doesn't describe it. Nervous doesn't seem to come close. Frantic? Possibly. But one thing is for sure: I've been working hard for the last several weeks trying to get today to happen. And in a little over two hours from this post, it will be all worth the trouble.

The show is installed and I get to make face with a public I locked myself away from. Or at least tried to.

This is the first time where I've finally taken notice of all the new faces in the school, what few there are floating around. And there are some cute ones. Some real twinks in the freshman class that make me feel very old and very ugly despite the compliments I'm getting from finally shaving off my three-month-long facial hair. At this point, I'm starting to feel more and more like my third avatar I posted here. Sexually stimulated but yet unable to enjoy it due to personal hang-ups and a lack of social finesse.

Tonight will be interesting. I'll have to make face, try to look like I know what I'm talking about, and above all else, behave.

Still, as much as this day is meant to be all about me, I can't help but wonder if it really is. My mom is getting the house ready for a friend of my sister who is staying the weekend due to the uncomfortable nature of driving alone from her college to my college on the interstate. Then there's the fact that I can't even pick where I would like to eat out for my celebratory dinner because I like seafood but none of my sister's friends do. And I was feeling like sushi!! Oh, and tomorrow? We're all playing the role of tour guides for my sister's friend, with an intent to kill two birds with one stone by having my celebratory dinner, which has been pushed up to lunch, at a tourist hot spot. So instead of sushi, I get hamburgers at Opry Mills.

As upset as all this could make me, I have only this thought to cancel it all out: I got published in the Nashville Scene and my image took up half of the front page of the Critics' Pick section. To quote a Disney Channel character, "YAY ME!"